the garden

"round and round the garden went the teddy bear
one step, two step,
tickle under there..!"

spent the whole afternoon at my mum's workplace after my lunch
the simple giggles and tears the lil' kids share
the teachers scolding them for the simple things
when we would have just smile and gotten over it
their rehearsals for their concert is just so simple for us
how cute they can get with their moves..

i guess the times had passed and will never come back
the light of the childhood will never shine on us again..

*****

"Hey There Delilah"

Hey there Delilah
What's it like in New York City?
I'm a thousand miles away
But girl, tonight you look so pretty
Yes you do
Times Square can't shine as bright as you
I swear it's true

Hey there Delilah
Don't you worry about the distance
I'm right there if you get lonely
Give this song another listen
Close your eyes
Listen to my voice, it's my disguise
I'm by your side

Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
What you do to me

Hey there Delilah
I know times are getting hard
But just believe me, girl
Someday I'll pay the bills with this guitar
We'll have it good
We'll have the life we knew we would
My word is good

Hey there Delilah
I've got so much left to say
If every simple song I wrote to you
Would take your breath away
I'd write it all
Even more in love with me you'd fall
We'd have it all

Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me

A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they've got planes and trains and cars
I'd walk to you if I had no other way
Our friends would all make fun of us
and we'll just laugh along because we know
That none of them have felt this way
Delilah I can promise you
That by the time we get through
The world will never ever be the same
And you're to blame

Hey there Delilah
You be good and don't you miss me
Two more years and you'll be done with school
And I'll be making history like I do
You'll know it's all because of you
We can do whatever we want to
Hey there Delilah here's to you
This ones for you

Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's what you do to me
What you do to me.

the words will never sound in my life...

-living on those memories, thanks for giving them to me...-

simplicity

had been sleeping for the past 12 hours..
and i've taken a 2 whole hours of nap in the evening.
the sweet nap + the pig-in times,
guess this is one of my missing part of my life since i've stepped into my 17th year on earth.

i've been blog-hopping for the past many days
and those afternoons when i'm off to have fun, or home
yet they are busy finishing off their revision
these things are like what i will suffer in the next year
[see the word "suffer!"]
the A's which many of them are taking.
seems so horrible and scary
it just takes away your happiness and dump the whole lot of stress on your shoulders
it's just e govt way of testing how much we had learnt for the past 2 years
yet it's so-freaking-people's-life-out
nonetheless,
we had to cross this huge boulder to get to the other side to see light,, .
well, just had to say,
ALL THE BEST to those taking them


thinks this song is not bad..
deep with simplicity..

*****

isn't life the same as it
i choose to not to divulge anything
and i shall stick to my words
the anything seems to be next to nothing

*****
yeahh,
i've found someone to lunch with!!
will continue this blog later on (:

photos blog

i don't know which side to stand
the confusion life the ironies of life
the sweet~nothingness
i feel like screaming out loud
but no voice would come out...

randoms..
was just searching for "screams!!" on google images and they gave me this:
cute yeahh..??
at least i smile a tiny smile..
it's from this interesting links i chanced upon..
http://blog.photoblogs.org/2006/05/



life can seem how cruel or pretty...
the stark contrast
either i fall or i not



my answer to my doubts:

Cover your eyes from the lies right in front of you

-shall thou just stop thinking...-

.preoccupied.

tomorrow is the second last paper for the year
MOTHER TONGUE!!
so peeps!
good luck to all =))
i ought to be studying.
but i don't have the mood to..
too preoccupied with some other thoughts

*****

I'm feeling nonetheless.
I'm just expecting more...
it doesn't require your presence to distract me...
i can't stop it...

-I've realized the avarice:greed in me...-

1 litre of tears

ooops, i realised i've forgotten to wish pohyu happy birthday..
felt so guilty.
so here's one now.. =))
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, pohPOH!!!
ump-hummpphh!
when's our tai-tai mahjong session??

*****

here's something i found meaningful on my friend's MSN nick
LOVE asked FRIENDSHIP, "Why do you exist when I already exist?"
FRIENDSHIP simply replied, "To put a smile when you leave tears.."
doesn't it makes so much sense..

this video is about the show "1 litre of tears"
i watched this show last year..
but watching this videos still revoke the feelings inside me.



1 Litre of Tears also called A Diary with Tears is a Japanese television drama about a girl who was diagnosed with an incurable degenerative disease at 15, but was able to continue her life until her death at the age of 25.

this is the song the class sang for her.



i guess this is the meaning of cherishing those around you..

-i can't help but relate..-

Your Body is Producing 230 Watts!

This is 8% LESS wattage than the average person

• You could light up 2 light bulbs
• You could power 58 iPods
• You could power 1 Xbox 360
• 4 of you would be needed to keep a refrigerator running

If you want to share your power output, copy and paste the HTML code below to display it on your own site.

230 WATTS Body Battery Calculator - Find Out How Much Electricity Your Body is Producing
when things get too boring
and i just have no mood to study for Chinese..
idea struck me when i was browsing takky's blog

- i cant feel where is my heart...-

1st rehearsal

had a rehearsal..
at some ulu place
where me and sherman had so much difficulty finding
but we still managed to trek all the way there..

should it be a "ice-breakers" session instead..
it's pretty fun doing weird stuff with a bunch of strangers
but soon we managed to make friends with everyone
and at the end is mass exchange of numbers

this requires quite a lot of commitment,
will be having more upcoming rehearsals
nevertheless,
the hanging out with new people,
the long journey back home with them
was just enjoyable

today, i bought soya bean drink
again, with pearls.
the entire week I've been like drinking at least a cup of bubble tea a day
all with pearls
and i could not help it but think how unhealthy it is
so here's some nutritional values I've managed to find on the web.
this is ONLY for the "pearls"/boba/tapioca balls..
not considering the flavored syrup..

Serving Size: 1 Serving

Calories	87.5
Total Fat (g)	0
Sodium (mg)	22.4
Total Carbohydrates (g)	21.3
Sugar (g)	15.14
Protein (g)	0

reference from: http://www.lollicup.com/main.cfm?tm=boba.htm&side=products.cfm&id=boba&page=boba.cfm

as you can see,
it's nothing but mostly calories
ahhh, so people,
better stop drinking too much of it..
that applies to me too.. =)

*****

things are alright now
i felt relieved..
now, when??
i'm still waiting...

-amidst all the happenings, i think of ...-

1 more day

vending had their restock..
nearly everyone is there
it feels good when we would be the same next year as it is now..
the last day..
we will know the truth soon
all the best

report slips tomorrow as well,
or should it be today???

****

when the facts get to hard to comprehend
when i hope i can stop bothering to try
when i will then just wait...
i guess it's all up to...

-the stars will continue shimmering in the sky, i hope..-

him

it's been so long,
since i had dinner with the fellow councillors.
one more person is cleared.
and there's like 36 more hours to go before the horror ends
i hope it will end by then
it will be then i can settle down my thoughts and concentrate my other stuff

*****

i've just been pondering a lot over it
although it doesn't seems to matter if i care or not.
there's already alot of people worrying
why should i even care if i doesn't makes any difference.
i wish i could be indifferent, like you are..

-standing strong, i hope i can take it, but you hope i cant...-

emo period

*****
entering into the time
we will be strong if we stand together..
we will be..
i need to go away from my current life..
i need a break

-things will be fine, in less than a week's time.. i hope so..-

my weekends!

BEWARE! this is a super long post for my entire weekend!!

photos from yesterday!
out with my family..

cool dude! the love of our lives!



posee!!



killing my sis!!



pretty desert with my mum



does the jacket look familiar, jia wen???

a sigh of relief!
I've spent my entire Sunday afternoon on my I&R [insights & reflections, sorry, i cant footnote it(=].
for those who doesn't know,
it's actually part of PW, project work,
which just takes up our stress-OUT days after promos.
it is practically driving me nuts.
the wr (written report) and op (oral presentation) is real rubbish
although there seems to be a few components to the entire PW subject,
but with the many many drafts we had to submit,
it's just takes up the entire year.
so much of training us for the future when i just don't understand the significance behind all these except to add on to our already "heavy" workload.

enough of whinings..
now is back to the other parts of my life.
actually I'm not really doing a lot of things since promos was over.
i was practically relaxing the whole day
and pushing away more important stuff for fun
council work is piling up,
but I'm just been procrastinating
and I've been having fun for the past few weeks
leaving so much outstanding matters to clear.
vending, prom, TMP, etc etc etc..
those ICs working with me are such poor things..
shall settle down from today onwards.

next few things on the calendar is as follows
Chinese A's, Fahrenheit 652, Prom..
Left with last week to chinese A's
gotta study for it
cos i hope to do well
and not need to take this another "waste-my-time" subject next year.
i want to be like my great mentor
suaning me when her timetable ends latest at 3 plus
and me at 5 plus.

i still have the Sunburst Youth Camp (SYC).
something isn't like a normal camp,
but just staying out from home for the ENTIRE week in dec,
to play host to students from other ASEAN countries.
somethings which seems interesting yet tiring i guess.
imagine a camp which requires rehearsals held by professional choreographer to prepare us for Cultural night,
something that likens our campfire night on last night of the camp
and it's starting this weekend..
dang!
there goes my weekends..

*****

is this the meaning of getting a life of my own??
i will endure all these.
hearing things not from you
seeing through your facade
worrying deep inside, silently
you will be fine..

- i pray for you, hoping all will be over soon.. on a better note..-

ratain

shag...
went for keechen's class chalet on yesterday night.
helped them set up fire,
cos their class has only that few pathetic guys and the bimbos to add to the chaos
although wasn't of much help
but my arms still ache big time from all the frantic fanning
after that went home to nap a while longer,
and im out shopping again with my family..

when i took bus home from chalet
the long bus journey was planned to recoup my beauty sleep
but was too disrupted by a sms
i just thought hard and recall the many many things that had happened
ever since i chose mj and joined council.

the reality can be so harsh
to anybody, even to the good guys
i'm not sure how to express myself well,
but only words of thanks for making my council life, my life in MJ much more special in every ways.
we always poke fun at him
and he still accepted them,
thanks!

we will always remember those days..

-the harsh reality of life, and the dark moments...-

BBQ pics

finally finished loading the pictures from the bbq onto my laggy com

here's some of them!



trying to take our "family" portrait using the huge mirror:



the b'dae cake.



our 1st attempt to have everyone's faces in
camera set on timer, and we just keep posing



timer just keeps going off...


and after our umpteen attempts,

tadaaa~~still some faces are blocked!



-the girls of the night
and when someone can't figure out what gender he/she is..




and the guys of the night-
and the someone blocks people's face again.. tsktsk.



lastly, the two person dear to me
they really liven up my secondary school life..

-all these seems to be a thing of the past...-

baby kynan is a big boy!!
his cute laughters when he sees someone familiar
when he's having fun..
his big round eyes gazing into you..
they just made my day.

oh! there goes his first kiss!! [actually just getting a bit off a HUGE Forever Friends bear at his house!!]

when can we ever have those again...

***

i just realize some reasons for all these
maybe I'm thinking too much
but i could only hope for the best
keeping my fingers crossed..

-all's well will end well, i guess..-

old classmates

it had been long since I've got a good laugh with my old classmates
reminiscing about our past together
laughing at those silly lil' incidents
doing all these stupid stuff again

it really made my day
with all these jokes that they used to crack
the lame-ness
the joy
the everything

how i wish i could go back to those times
but it's never possible...
for we've all chosen a different route to take.

We've taken lots and lots of photos,
shall upload some of them when i gotten them
hope we can have one of these again soon..

let's just look to the future instead
and hope for the best

-when i need to be strong and independent, without...-

innocence

this song just keep playing in my head.
INNOCENCE by Avril Lavigne

Waking up I see that everything is OK
The first time in my life and now it's so great
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed
I think about the little things that make life great
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay

This moment is perfect
Please don't go away
I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by

I found a place so safe, not a single tear
The first time in my life and now it's so clear
Feel calm, I belong, I'm so happy here
It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect
Please don't go awayI need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by

It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry
It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry

This innocence is brilliant
Makes you wanna cry
This innocence is brilliant
Please don't go away
Cause I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by


when's the need to differentiate between innocence and ignorance?

today was considered a happy day for me.
not sure why,
but it just makes me feel better.
when your good friend accompanys you,
having to carry a heavy lappie
going window shopping with you
to while your time away.
instead of you going home alone to emo again
I'm just so touched..

especially,
when your good friend cry with you,
when she shouldn't be at all affected.
when she just feels for you..
when she thinks for you..
when she knows know you better than anyone else..
i really appreciate all these, girl..

thanks for giving me such a wonderful friend
in place of all these pain caused..

things will get better..

-the need to stand strong, no matter what...-

post mortem

for those who had gotten all their results:

cheers for those who did relatively well
for those who did not,
try not to predict so much
think positive, stay optimistic.

the sun will always shine after the rain..
things will change for a better..

-it takes alot to cheer one up...-

emo~ing

the sun took a peek in the morning
soon it went to hiding behind the dark clouds.
and it stays gloomy for the rest of the day.

though pw is driving me nuts,
but the long chats,
during those draggy OP lessons,
with jia wen are nice and soothing..
at least i know that im not the only one out there..

time seemed to have slowed down.
but is it really so in reality??

not sure what made me walked home from the interchange
the long walk in solitude
listening to the music
oblivious to other noises
just observing the people in the neighbourhood
set me into deep thoughts.
pondering over stuffs..

the weather was kind enough
no sun,
yet no rain
enjoyed this

nevertheless
when my mood follows suit
it's not that nice afterall...

no matter how beautiful something is,
a crack on it will stay on it..
it'll never be gone..

-when i'm next to nothing..-

what am i to you

I just have to sudden urge to blog
although i have no idea what to mention
i'm feeling lousy
i'm feeling lost
give me some directions...

anyways, today's the 7th..

-what am i doing here, doing nothing..-

post promos

times when the tears run dry,
when we no longer have the strength to carry on
when it just gives me a sense of relief
and no longer the sense of satisfaction nor joy
when the chimes of rejoice no longer sounds

I'm just clueless as to what is happening
i just fear the worst to come
i dread the truth
but i would rather the truth

the route of escapade does not work
we cant keep running away from reality
face it!

-when all those hopes and thoughts turn out to be the opposite...-