return me my peace in life.

it's always a bliss not to know so much.

i hate it so much to be deceived.

think to you they're just white lies,

but seriously they are not.

since it doesnt matters to you,

so what matters?

people are so great at making things to their disadvantage and not bother about what the others feel.

i can see that you are trying,

but trying isnt enough without the sincerity.

try harder, and i feel more put off instead.

i dont think you can handle so much in one go,

so please stop trying.

i dont meant to be personal with anyone.

if you think it's you,

then i think you must be one of there people.

for me, i think it does occur to me,

when my thoughts were selfish to others.

this is so called human nature.

im just sorry that we have such nature,

but i think we must learn how to handle it.

i will try harder..

remember my theory of karma, the golden rule and what nots..

what you do unto others, others will do unto you.

so true, but so easily forgotten.

come on kelly, why be affected by people who arent worth it.

move on, and get a life.

-i'll just take it as a trust misplaced. but seriously im feeling so disgusted.-

exams, pms, homesickness..

exams are sick.

tests before exams are worst.

not sure if i can endure so long before the start of the exams.

need to be stuck here in hall.

with no one i can talk to as and when i like.

no kaiser i can hug, no kynan whom i can hug.

eating the same old canteen food over and over again.

who says uni life is tonnes better than college days ought to be shot.

they are equally bad

just that in different sense.

hope i will be equally stressed throughout the weekdays.

so that i can complete my work fast and go home next week.

horrible staying in the room on my own.

but if i were to go out and mingle,

i know i wont be able to study.

such a dilemma!

argghss!

hateful but cant help it.

this bout of homesickness is real bad.

coupled with the stress and inconfidence for my papers.

if im not gonna S/U my korean,

i better put in ten fold more effort.

kelly, you better do it or you will regret.

if im unable to breakaway from the paper chase,

i better start working hard.

better than regretting and being remorseful after getting my grades.

sometimes i really pause and ponder,

what am i doing all these for.

and i will just end up with the same conclusion.

because i don have the courage to stop what i am doing

or the piece of degree than thousands others are pursuing with me;

i had to endure these shit.

it's just 3 and half more years.

thereafter,

life changes completely.

school stops,

and i will start complaining about how life sucks at that moment and how school used to be so wonderful.

life's like that,

im like that.

we will never be happy with what we have.

so much of telling myself to being contented.

i can only look up to my role models,

and tell myself to work harder to achieve what i've achieved.

no matter what my life turns out to be,

it's in my own hands.

if i want to continue wasting my life away,

living my life at my own pace,

who cares about me.

everyone, everybody everything still move on...

alrights,

pms stress and homesickness seriously ain't best friends):

-i will grow stronger from life's challenges.. yes i will...-